the shuffle. [2/3/07]

[ed. note: this is news from the week of Jan. 28th, 2007 to Feb 3rd, 2007. We at rock the dub apologize for this being late - nigga had niggas over, and got a bit lazy!]

What it do, crew? I just want to first shout out Mike from Keepin' It Right Radio for hooking me up with this Pharrell blends mixtape from DJ Jus Ske. My Mind Playin' Tricks On Me mashes up loads of beats over the acapellas of Pharrell's In My Mind monstrosity. I mean the first track alone drops "Broken Language", "Deep Cover" and other gems from yesteryear under Skateboard P's "Show You How To Hustle", which is just astonishing. Makes his ridiculous pipe dream raps sound somewhat interesting... also, if you get a chance, peep out Jus Ske's Google-esque website: how dude got his shit working that nicely and that much of a replica of Google's webpage astonishes me - just do some digging, and see how he jacks CNN, Google Images, eBay, and other popular websites. Keep your ears peeled on this Jus Ske cat - looks like he might be doing big things this year!

And if you guys are looking for the special 2 hour(!!) Disco D tribute from DJ Ayers and Nick Catchdubs, grab that set HERE (shouts to The Fader, Ayers & Catchdubs for hooking this up).

Anyways, let's just keep it light and get this thing going, shall we?

01/Jay-Z, you keep hustlin', baby. I like how he went from hawking everything from whips to clothes to jewels in his raps, but is now getting his own hue, his own deal with Budweiser Select, and other ventures. The latest company to link up with Hov is Coca-Cola, who is trying to get their Cherry Coke line back into the stores, and figure Jigga might be the one to put the right spin the franchise. Niggas who are allergic to cherries are even going to be flocking to drink this stuff. Now I know what you real Hip-Hop heads are saying: "SELLOUT!" Yo, you have to reinvent your thinking, people. These days, rap music sales make NO MONEY! I applaud these guys trying to get their paper right quick, whether they hustle their own wares or link up with big conglomerates. This is the future, and the next phase of pimpin' the industry, and who better to charter that yacht than the man who showed you street cats how to really floss like the big dogs? In other Jay news, reported that the Nets accepted $400 Million from some UK company for the rights to rename the Brooklyn Nets' center the Barclays Center, but word quickly came out that the Barclays also caked off on the backs of slaves back in the 18th century, as well as shady dealings back in the 1980s with South Africa. Now, bygones should be bygones, but come on - how many players on the Nets are Black? It's not a good look, especially given the Cristal-fiasco from late last year. Will the Nets give that loot back? I highly doubt it, at least not yet. It's Black History Month, so we might see more "Black History" commercials on the YES Network, but $400 Mil is a gang of loot. In the final bit of Hova-related news, it looks like Jiggaman and Beyonce will be releasing their next singles, "Hollywod" and "Upgrade U" (respectively), simultaneously, even filming videos for the singles at the same time. That's going to be a hot concept -- it would just help if both tracks were hot, and not some of their most boring output in years. Maybe we will get a "Kingdom Come" video from Jay some day, complete with him in Superman garb? A nig can dream, can't he?

02/Now, I'm probably late as fuck on this, but did you guys hear about this Paris Exposed website? From what I understand, the people behind the site bought the contents of a storage unit Paris Hilton didn't keep up the payments with. Simple enough, but this idiot, who can't stay out of the limelight, have everything from videos (which include her not only bathing and having sex, but snorting crazy amounts of coke off some random dude's chest) to secret diaries, IDs, and a host of other affects that she absent-mindedly left to be sold off. Now, this site has apparently only been up for a few weeks, and Paris is suing the owners of the site for using her image to get paid: they are charging like $40 for membership to the website, which lets you view EVERYTHING! My thing is, OK Paris, you are suing, I understand that, but it's YOUR FAULT that they got a handle on all of this shit in the first place. And with her making these ridiculous comments while being coked out, you really did that to yourself, right? If you knew this shit was in a unit that you were paying on, and you are so upset that the world now knows even MORE than we'd like to know about your scandalous ass, why even create the shit to begin with?

03/The funniest thing to happen in any Black History Month happened on the first day, courtesy of 2008 Presidential hopeful Senator Joe Biden. He made some retardo comments about my man Barack Obama being "clean", as well as being a "mainstream African-American", as well as pulling a Chris Rock, saying Obama was "articulate" ("he speaks so well! He's so well spoken!"). He tried cleaning up, saying he meant that Barack was "crisp" and "sharp as a tack", but really, we already know that Obama is a fucking senator. This nigga been on TV so much the last couple of years, pressed and impressing anyone who hears him speak. We don't need you, Mr. Jolly White Candidate, to let us know that the nigga knows how to speak and wash. He didn't just come out of a coma, he's on the fast track to become a US President. Reading that linked article, I see that Biden also made some comment like "'you cannot go to a 7-Eleven or a Dunkin' Donuts unless you have a slight Indian accent", which may or may not be true, but still, coming from someone in his position, it makes me realize how inexperienced and truly unverse these white politicians are with the changing racial makeup of the United States. Hopefully he raises no ends and has to back out super early.

04/This is a sad story, and a real fucked up way for people in authority to act: there was a woman who told police she was raped, and ended up being arrested on an old warrant. Crazy right? It gets deeper: the po-po then refused to give her the morning-after pill because of their religious convictions. Now, what part of this even makes sense? First off, isn't the situation supposed to go like this: woman comes to cops saying she is raped, and is checked into a hospital so a rape kit, counseling and other shit get done? I didn't think you'd report a crime, they'd run YOUR background, then arrest you. Living in Trenton, I've heard stories of gangbangers pull pieces in stores, get shot, and go to the hospital to heal their wounds, THEN GET SENT TO JAIL! They might be under custody in the hospital, but they are still in the hospital! It just boggles my mind that the men and women that many consider to be the only line of defense in a cruel and harsh world are not doing their job when they need to be. And they wonder why niggas think 911 is a joke...

05/I wanna take some time out to laugh at the advertising sectors over at [adult swim] and Cartoon Network for hanging those fake bombs up in Boston: LMFAO! I mean, you can't think of anything better than hanging these bootleg Lite-Brites under bridges in high-traffic areas? All I can say is, Cartoon Network is owned by Turner Broadcasting, so you KNOW there will be some firings over the money they will have to kick out to make Boston happy. Bad, dumb move. Should have thrown up random light-brite JPEGs on official websites of many different places.

06/Andy Reid, the head coach of Philly's Eagles, is one master craftsman. He not only kept their name in the spotlight by jacking Donovan McNabb's talk time (which I whole-heartedly agree with: if you can't play, you shouldn't be given a mic), but he sent both of his sons out there to commit crimes during Super Bowl week, just to keep the team's name in lights! What troopers. His son Britt not only pulled out a weapon while in an altercation with another motorist, but he had smack on him! The AP reported that he had "police recovered a shotgun, ammunition, a container holding eight clear baggies with white residue, a container with white powder, four small white pills, and a pharmacy bottle holding a green leafy substance"; was them losing in the playoffs that hard on Britt? On the flipside, Garrett seriously injured a driver he got into a collision with, but was not charged. How the FUCK does that happen? If I went outside right now, pimp slapped some old guy to the point where he had to go to the hospital, how would I not get locked up or at least catch a charge? Being white and a coach's son in America has its privileges!

07/When I was a shorty, stories like this were the fodder for issues of Penthouse Letters, but it seems like in 2007, this shit is the stuff of everyday occurances. This mom out of California got busted for a party she put on for some teens after 2 of the kids got into a car wreck (the article says something like 12 heads were packed into a 4Runner, which is strange in and of itself). Word is homegirl got the kids drunk, and even gave up the poonani to two of the partygoers. First, it's fine ass substitute teachers giving kids what they all secretly want, now "Stacy's Mom" get kids boozed up and tore down. And her hubby is (was?) a police officer! She actually kicked the kids out because he was on his way home from work. Impressive.

08/Now, I tell people about how I've grown up, and they know that while I lived in Trenton, NJ, my life wasn't thuggish ruggish. I grew up around some of that drama, but it didn't seep into my life. Now, living outside of the capitol city, the gangs and drama ended up moving onto my street. I was awoken this past Thursday to what I later found out were a crew of sherriff's officers and SWAT/TASK force dudes ramming into a house across the street of mine, which in turn ended up being a small part of a big Bloods ring that got busted that morning. They called it "Operation Dawg Pound", because these guys called each other 'dawg' and had dog paws tatoo'd on their person. OK, well Randy Jackson calls EVERYONE 'dawg', so we should expand this case outside the NJ area, no? In all seriousness, though, things like that can lead to problems. I don't doubt the intelligence of my fine Trenton police force, but hell, I call my boy Russell "dogs". I say that shit in the wrong vacinity, and I am liable to get hog-tied. Hopefully this stops the flow of drugs, even for a little bit... but then again, Diane Sawyer said Camden has something like 33 arrests a day for drugs. A day? She said it...

09/A funny story related to this one involves this old guy who got into a gun battle with 5-0 and lost his life. This 80 year old man was apparently invovled in a drug bust, and when the cops approached him and asked him to drop his piece, he said "no". Ornery old fool that he was, he gets shot twice in an effort to "subdue" him, which I can justify: I've seen some of those old buggers, when encited, start thrashing and become really hard to handle. Two shots is surprisingly low. In any case, they are beefing with the city for questions on if they responded appropriately. OK, maybe they didn't inform him OFF THE RIP that they were undercover narcos. My thing is, what the fuck difference does it make if they had to hide behind trees to avoid his gunfire!?

10/You know, nuns might be cellibate, but they understand the pains some people might have when they can't have sex. In the UK, the nuns paid for a 22 year old guy with muscular dystrophy to get some action from a prostitute, mainly because, in his condition, he couldn't get the kind of intimate relationship he had wanted. The fucked up part to that touching story? He ends up getting the sex from a well-meaning nightwalker, and ends up having an unfufilling time. No shit, dogs, you have muscular dystrophy. You know what they say, though: be careful what you pray for...

11/To deviate from the pains of the world, let's give you lot a round-up of the world of Hip-Hop: Little Brother is now a duo, with the recent departure of 9th Wonder from the group. I can understand them having a conflict, but it comes with a price: while 9th's beats are stale (he's done so much work over the last 4, 5 years that has been "same-y"), most people got into them BECAUSE OF his beats. I mean, Phonte might be able to rap and sing, but the only reason I didn't sleep on Pooh's Sleepers was because of 9th's production. At the end of the day, I have one question: will outside producers coming in really make people still grab copies of Photiggalo and Pooh's raps? Time will tell. Also, there hasn't been much word in terms of what goes on with the Justus League... is 9th still a part of this?... pimpin' Katt Williams spoke to All Hip-Hop about his forthcoming LP on Dipset Records, which I have been waiting for ever since I heard him diss Young Gunz with The Game. He's surprisingly skilled on the mic, which will hopefully drive sales of his album. Plus, he has crazy appeal outside the regular nigga outlets, so that's always a plus... Timbaland is speaking about his upcoming LP, Shock Value, saying that it's "sequenced like a movie", as if this has not been done before in Hip-Hop... Finally, niggas like Fabolous need not speak candidly about shootings outside of their rhymes. Fab spoke this week about his feelings after that shooting a few months back, he pulled this gem out of his ass: "Even when I got my truck back [after the shooting], I looked at [one of the shots] in the windshield — it was high enough to be a head shot. I looked at that as being more dangerous than the leg thing." You think? I mean, inside my head, I have the fucking computer that controls my being. My leg? There are a few veins that might be irreplaceable if damaged. Think about that for a sec, Fab. In any case, Fabolous has a new LP coming this year that he hopes will reestablish his reign as that go to nigga for pop-rap. Good luck on that one, you non-spelling bastard.

12/Here's a potpourri of news bits that interested me, but not enough to warrant a full write up on them: RIP Barbaro... did you know that Verizon got presented the iPhone deal two years ago, but turned it down? Speaking of the iPhone, Apple and Cisco are going to duke it out over the "iPhone" name after Valentine's Day. Big up the St. Valentine's Day Massacre, pt. 2... novelist Sidney Sheldon passed away at 89. I had no idea he created both I Dream of Jeannie AND The Patty Duke Show!... Finally, did you know that Mike Tyson has gone into rehab? My thing about this is, he hooked up with the same posh spot that Lindsay Lohan is currently in. Who is fronting the bill for this lay-up? Fucking coke does your brain in, Mike; good luck.

Alright, that's all I have for the week that was. Hope you all enjoyed, and I'll just leave you with this, the Iron Mike that was:

And for a few of you "Mike Tyson's Punch Out!" fans, here is some humor: see someone beat "Punch Out!" in 17min 51secs, then watch a LIVE version of "Punch Out!"... LOL!

Until next time...

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