I've just come up with a new concept: NiggaMath. I had a co-worker walk through saying she was leaving 6 minutes late, so that will compute to coming in 15 minutes late the next day. I found this funny, but strangely, it's true. My 15 minutes of lunch time being eaten up by moving boxes turned into an additional 25 minutes of lunch time added. I mean, fair is only fair.

You fault Niggas, Niggas will fault you double, you smell me?

This doesn't just work for Work though, you can use this anywhere The Man tries to hold you down.

Let's say your tax check comes in a few weeks late, for whatever clerical error. Doesn't that warrant you to pay your taxes a month late the following year?

When the state's sales tax skins off an additional 60 cents on the dollar for your purchase, it's only fair that when the idiot at the cash register refuses to read your coupon correctly, you go ahead and pay $1.74 for your $9 lunch (this really happened to me at a local Uno's; classic situation).

The record labels charge you absurd amounts for glorified maxi singles, so why not go ahead and just jack the tracks when you can?

The only time NiggaMath doesn't work is in violent situations. There is a problem when a stolen chain turns into 18 niggas dead. That's improper use of NiggaMath. Matter of fact, you should be held back in NiggaMath class and take your trigger-happy ass back to Nigga-garten, so you can learn that it's an eye for an eye, not a life for a chain.

NiggaMath©. The wave of the future.

(Got any other examples of NiggaMath? Scream at the kid.)

No comments: