MauryMath©

Unemployed TV is the best thing out there. It's the shows you miss when you are working that really get you going -- part of the reason my wife and I live by our DVRs. The one show we have always taped over the last 4+ years of our relationship is Maury. And with one amazing discovery that has been tested and tried, the makers of NiggaMath© now bring to you...

MauryMath©!

Now, this primarily applies to the use of percentages to predict the future, mainly to determine paternity. It breaks down something like this:

You ever notice how when someone says that they are more than 100% of anything (not the father, are the father, faithful, etc.), it is usually the direct opposite? While Keisha might feel she is "275%" sure that Quameek is the father, 9 times out of 10 Quameek is definitely NOT the father, in fact neither is his cousin Shookwan or his father, Dee-Dock. And on the flipside, if Quameek were to feel that he was, oh, say "117.5%" sure he was not cheating on Keisha, chances are he not only cheated on her, but he did it about 200 times with 57 different women. I ask all of you to watch out for these instances -- if someone is more than 100% sure, they ain't so sure.

Now, there is a flipside to this: the super exaggarated assured-ness. Let's say Keisha was "2 billion % sure" that Quameek fathered both Rasheed AND lil Taquayla -- that throws all rules out, and it's a very good idea to bet the farm on Quameek being the father to both of those kids. It's just how it goes: when a female is THAT sure, it's definitely law. Quameek, though, is never that sure. That's how he got into this mess.

So be on the lookout for MauryMath©, and try to incorporate it into your everyday life.

Share: